homeee..

Its getting closer n closer. Going home that is, besides the end of exams!

Man, I can't wait.

Here's roughly why(in no proper order):

Basketball!

Buttermilk chicken.
Thien Thien Chicken Rice.
Ideal.
Ayamku.
No need to cook.
Husky.
Family.
Car.
Astro.
XBox.
eXcapade.
Thiam Hock.
Tutong Kolomee.
No freezing weather.
The Sun.
Coconut Grove Fresh Bee Hoon.
.
.
.

(Heck, the majority are food!)

But I think the way the human brain works is weird. Who knows? Maybe after a few mths back, Ill be blogging about how I miss living in Glasgow.

But most importantly, we should learn how to seize and ALWAYS appreciate the moment.
Accomplish what you want to accomplish when/while you can, don't wait!
or Freaking do what you want. Don't wait already!
(Haha. But its hard to do that.
We almost always succumb to the "tomorrow lah",
"still got next week mah", "got chance one" thoughts.)

Why?
Coz you never know if you'd ever be presented with this moment or
another chance ever again. You just never know.




Hmm.. Wondering why am I talking bout these eh?



Is Bernard contemplating whether to tell that special someone how he feels bout her?



or..



Is he gonna end it all by doing a superman stunt from the roof??




or..





argghh... what's it?




WHAT IS ON HIS MIND??


Hehehe..

Nah.. No big deal. Seriously. Be ready to be disappointed. A bit childish I guess.
i.e. I fear not being able to go to the stadiums & a few places that I intend to go before I go back! Shyt!
The sudden existence of the Swine is not helping at all.
My parents might recall me back early if Swine decides to get serious!

Now how ?

Let's recall..

-----The timeline-----

9 months ago, si beh lots of time, rather stay at home, slacking, chatting, Facebooking. Why not get my ass out of the house for a bit? Very hard meh?

6 months ago.. A few down. The rest next time la. Still got 6 months left mah.

3 months ago. Summer ba. Wa seh. Still 'tai ba' time.

3 weeks ago. What?? Swine flu outbreak? Possibility of pandemic? Cham liao. How to go??!


So,
Moral of the story: If chance presents itself, "hoot" nia. DON'T WAIT!

...

Anyways, talking about dominant ladies in relationships. This is SCARY and SILLY. Is it because the girl was really hot? I could not see her face. Or.. No more women in China as hot as that lady? Or what?! See for urself:

Give, Dont' Only Take!

From : link

I came across this article..


"Giving makes you happier. It's true.

"Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give."

Eleanor Roosevelt

When we give to others joyfully, we experience great happiness. I've experineced many examples of this in my own giving, especially here on this website

Let's take a look at a good, simple example of the giving makes you happy theory. Think back to when we were kids. There was always that kid who never wanted to let you play with his toys. He never shared and everything was always, "Mine, mine, mine!" That kid was NEVER happy. He was never satisfied, usually angry and not generally the kid you wanted to hang around.

Then there was the nice kid who shared everything without thought or hesitation."Sure Billy, you can play with my toys." or "I brought enough matchbox cars, we can each have two apiece!" That kind of kid knew early on that not only would the sharing of his or her toys make other kids happy BUT it would make him or her even happier in the process. There is a certain fulfillment that comes with sharing. They were generous in there giving, gave with joy and had happy friends who liked to be around them. He or she was well liked and a great example that giving, even in the smallest sense, makes you happier."

Taken from : http://www.power-of-giving.com/giving-makes-you-happier.html

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It is not the first time that I have read something which is similar. Its been said over and over again, that the joys of giving outweighs the joys of taking. But weirdly, this certainly isn't the case as I see it as we grow older.


You might say, you might be one of those who love to give. Yeah, you do give to charities. True, but giving does not only be in terms of money. There are a lot more things you can give. Time, knowledge, love, thought are some that the world seem to overlook. It is so common to encounter ppl who are of the "1 to 1" mentality. What that means? They only do something after one has done it to them. What accompanies such thoughts, or more accurately, results in such thoughts, are questions/beliefs such as "Why should I do that when he/she doesn't?" and "I'll be stupid if I do that." Well, of course no one wants to be a doormat. But if everyone thinks like that, the world would ultimately come to a standstill where everyone waits for everyone. The world would be a place full of grumpy and miserable souls thinking that everyone else is selfish and greedy.

STOP!!

Think the other way round. Why not, be the initiator of things? Why not be the one that starts something? In other words, you have to give something. Let's take for example a group project. The group of Mr A,B,C,D. Mr A,B,C finishes his task and waits. Mr D however is still working on his task. Now Mr D is stuck. What should the other 3 do? Should they sit and wait for him to finish it? Of course they must lah right? They've finish their tasks already what. Why the extra trouble right? WRONG. I believe if they had this mentality all the way, they'd end up with an incomplete project in the end of the day. There might be a few reasons why Mr D is stuck. One, he might be just pure lazy. Two, he's not lazy but doesn't know how to move on. So, should the others say "Yea, he so lazy. His fault. I dun wanna help. I wanna go back MSN first. C ya 2moro" and only help if Mr D is in the 2nd case? I think, NO! I am sure if Mr A,B,C had at least gave pointers, or encouraged Mr D a lil, he'd be surely doing a bit. Ahh, even if he doesn't the others should pick up the slack, thus, I m sure a more happier ending in the end eh? Yeah, of course that b*tch in Mr D sucks. He'll not be happy anyways. He'll lose 3 friends, and would be ashamed to even face any of em in d future. Don't sound very fun eh? Anyways, this shows giving(in this case, their time),and maybe bit of sacrifice does more good than bad in the end of the day.

More examples??
Giving brings joys everywhere. Even in sports. In bball for example, making a good pass, ie. giving up the ball to ur pal to score, would be counted as assists. Everyone knows how important assists are. Same case in footie. More assists=More goals=Winning&Happy Team.

Hmm.. Another example. The sharing of knowledge. The feeling you get after you've guided someone who sincerely wants to learn, is certainly satisfying. That's of course when you're sure that u've got sufficient knowledge to give. Not just throwing ur ego around. (Please say "I don't know enough to teach." or "Be sure to double-check with others, I am not very sure on this subject" instead. )

Gifts. The joy of surprising others with gifts! That sincere 'surprised' look that you get? Not only that, you might be on the other end the next time round too!

Still can't think of any? A smile! A simple smile could just brighten one's day. (Go google the advantages of smiling) Not only that, you're certain to receive a smile in return which will brighten ur day as well! =)

But warning: Giving and expecting gratitude is a NO-NO. One should only give sincerely. Why? If one doesn't receive the gratitude in the end of the day, he'll feel all miserable. Not only that, he'd waste whatever he has given. So why give in the first place?

Right, so why not change the way we think about the simple act of 'giving'? Clear those crappy negative thoughts about giving and waiting for something to happen. Sheesh. Life can certainly be a more joyous one simply by giving! Give Give Give ppl! =)

Let's live in a happy world! From : link

Please Brunei, learn to love dogs

I came across this sad video. Linked from Rano's if I have not mistaken.

Warning: The video consists of ain't-very-pleasing images if you know what I mean!!

I too, had one of my dogs killed by poison. I still remember the day that dog of mine died.

At that time, coming back home meant being greeted at the gate by 2 of my dogs. Lucy the German Shephard and Bingo the mixed breed one. They'd run towards me. Occassionally they would jump up to me too. I'd then guide them to their dens first, so that I could drive my car in(Who knows, they might run out of the house and attack a passerby while Im driving)

Anyways, on that fateful day. None of them came and greeted me by the gate. I called for em. But still no response. Something really wasn't right. I searched and searched around the whole compound for em. Still no sound, no sight of em. Then among the bushes, I spotted one of my dogs. He was just sitting there in a guarding-something posture. I called for him, he just ignored me. Then.. I saw it. She(Lucy) was lying there, with her tongue out. Her tongue was black (indication of poison). She was all fine in the morning, running about and all. It was IMPOSSIBLE to be a natural death.

The sight still haunts me. I so wish I could bash the f*ktard that did this. She was innocent. All she did was guard the house. Never did she cause any havoc or was a potential danger to the neighbourhood. For your info, I never let her out of my compound. I just could not think of a possible reason why you harmed my pet.

A German Shephard source

That is the fate of dogs in Brunei I guess. I've heard of many more similar cases as to dogs being poisoned. Seeing the carcasses of dogs lying dead isn't a rare sight here. Sights of stones being thrown to dogs is pretty common too. I saw that with my own eyes too. Groups of Malay boys coming over just to throw stones at my dogs. I think it is one of the actions that Bruneians (esp children) do when they see dogs, besides shouting at them or some other 'trying-to-get-the-dog's-attention' action. I don't know, maybe they just want to provoke them to start a possible chase? Maybe they love the thrill of being chased by dogs. Ahh.. what if you lost the chase? Do you know the consequences?

"Some dogs just chase wah with/without provoking"

Yeah yeah.. I know,.. Its true. Some dogs are mad. But not all dogs are mad. I always get extra careful when I see a stray dog nearby. I'd try my best not to provoke it in anyways. Just for your info, running past a sleeping dog or a dog that is eyeing you is not a very brilliant idea btw. That would excite the dog and prompt it to chase you.

There were 2 recent cases of stray dogs attacking ppl. It seems to me that the media seems to be more to the victims'(The bitten one) side. I don't have proper proof of this but you know, animals(esp. unwild animals such as dogs), do not attack unless provoked.

" If it ain't provoked, then it must 'sot' liao lah. Its a 'sot' one that attacked"

OK a possibility. But wait, if 'sot', why not others are attacked? You the only one who lived in that kampong ah?

"No lah.. Many ppl live here lah"

How come, those attacked are always the younger ones eh? Ohh, they were attacked while going back to school? Mate, you do not have a car to bring ur child?

" No car bah "

No car ah? Means ur child walks to n from school very often eh? If yeah, means the stray dogs were sent from heaven on the very day he/she( i forgot) was bitten huh?

" No lah.. They were there long time sudah "

Har.. No? Meaning you saw dogs in that area already before? Meaning they aint crazy before. So meaning the dogs went crazy on the day it decided to bite ?! So how many did it bit that day?

" 1 eh. You saw the news reported one mah "

1? Ohh.. so it just went crazy on that particular time during the day. Walao.. u damn lucky lah. Hope over the border and go buy lottery man, Im sure no problem for u. Sap sap water. Kena liao, can buy car leh.

"Eh no.. maybe a few more. They attacked when the reporters went into jamban for toilet break"

-.-""

To be honest, other possibilities do exist too lah. I might be wrong. Anyways that is just what I think. The key to solving this problem is not to kill dogs whenever u see them and think of dogs as some crazy biting machine that chases anything down. I think the mentality of most Bruneians is already like that in this department. Dogs have life too. They have the right to live. Like the video said, "Dogs do not know religion", and many other stuff that made sense.

Innocence source

The most applicable solution in this case is to take extra precaution when you see stray dogs, or enter into a house guarded by dogs. Keep in mind, never to provoke them. If they still persist in barking or still have a i-wanna-attack posture. Be wise lah. Use another route, or wait till the dog leaves the area. Another more ambitious solution that is always mentioned would be to collect all the strays and place them on a piece of land, or let them be adopted. I really dread the day that the government comes out with a rule to kill all strays or all dogs! I really hope that would not happen.

Once again, please please please don't harm the dogs. Learn to love them, Brunei.

Be Inspired

Study the pic:

What is this pic trying to portray?
What sort of message should such a pic give?


*


*


*


THINK first please...

*


*


*


Go re-study again for the last time please...


*


*


*


OK? Confident with the answer le ma?


*


*


*

OKay, I hope the answer you had has something to do with inspiration.. hahaha

"Walao! Sure bo? Doesn't look like it at all, man!"

Hehe.. Not very sure actually lol.
Im no super-duper-pro analyser of pics who can read correctly the message a particular pic is trying to tell.
Its actually one of the random pics I took sometime back when in the hope of capturing a nice pic showing the sun setting down.

"Har? Then what makes you think it gives a 'be inspired' message now?"

The bright sun.
I felt it showed hope!
In other words, hope down the stretch of road/journey.

"Ya la.. so it should give a 'hope' message instead of 'be inspired' lah. Bodoh lah lu."

Yes, the proper message should be around "hope".
Hah!
Anyways, the general point of this pic is to 'be inspired'.
Don't make sense eh?
Nevermind just read on and God bless.. Most likely it will by then..

Pictures have the power to send out messages.
Hope is just only one of em.

What should we do when the tough gets going?
What happens when it seems like there is no more hope?
Should I give in? or give up?

Once in a while, we do need that kick in d back. That 'spark'. The 'thing' that makes you dilate your pupil, sit up straight, adrenaline pumped at full efficiency, fists closed, then the 'message' suddenly appears and it says :

"Ill work hard!"


"I will strive!"


"Bring it!"


"Im ready!"


and many more self-reaffirming, positive statements that'll do nothing but bring good to you

That 'thing' we need is INSPIRATION.

I believe there are a few definitions of inspiration..

The one I'm referring to is this one below(from an Oxford dictionary btw):

Inspiration is defined as
'somebody or something that makes you want to be better, more successful, etc'

There you go..

Inspiration as seen from above can come from pictures. Where else?

Words

Words takes on many forms of uses. One of em is being an inspiration.

It is undeniable that our lives are filled with ups and downs. Whoever says that he/she only has ups only is a pure dumbnut that has no direction at all.

Thus, I thought, "why not share inspiring statements that I might stumble across?"

Not only will it serve as a reminder to me. Who knows? It might be of help to u too..

BINGO!

With that, the 'Be Inspired' section was born.

Scroll up for the first one! Top-right hand corner please =)

The end.


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ADVERT!

Interested in this?




Name: Lian Hui (in hokkien; Hui = Flower)
Used for: Upcoming Kuan Yin Dan/Tan Occassion on 21st of June
Price: $3 each
Reason for selling: I want to help you save a lil' mah. It costs ard $7 each at shops outside. Very exp! So why not save around $4 for one. Order from me loh.
To order: Usual contact methods or the brand new bernardologyz@gmail.com

I doubt the number of devout Buddhists reading this blog thou'. Hahaha.. Oh well, if ur interested do contact me and don't forget to state quantity too yah!

Good day ppl!

Dianne Odell

I was flipping thru' the pages in today's BB and came across this article entitled "Woman who spent life in iron lung dies".

Yep, this woman named Dianne Odell lived 58 of her 61 years in an iron lung. Mind you, its not those artificial lungs made of iron embedded into the body. Its a reportedly 750 pound iron machine covering her from neck to legs, as shown in the pic:


I was AWED when I searched and read articles about her. What a strong lady she is.
Imagine living in such a way on your back for 51 years.

WOW.. Not only that, she never lets this way of living stop her from having the education she wanted and also to pursue her dream of writing a book.

How hard is it for her to write a book?
- Her hands are in the machine, so she can't write, which means the only form is through voice recognition software
- She can only talk when her lung exhales.
- In the 1980s and 1990s, voice recognition computers are still relatively inefficient. To enter "CAT", she had to say "“Charlie-Alpha-Tango.”
- and so on..

The following are links I found informative on Dianne Odell, do read through:
Link 1
Link 2
Link 3 (Do watch the clip on the top right hand corner too. Shows Dianne talking)
Link 4

Sadly, she passed away on Tuesday due to a power outage (as the iron lung machine depends on electricity). Co-incidentally, the home generator also failed on that fateful day.

Nevertheless, with what she has gone through and how she influenced others with her beaming character, she is more than a hero to me.

What we can learn here is that we should not let our setbacks or weaknesses gloom our spirits and let it stop you from achieving your dreams and ambitions. If she can go through it all, why not us?

Rest in peace, Dianne Odell

autism

Hulo!

Anyone heard of the "Learning Ladders Society"? yeap yeap.. on papers ada juga, on rano's site too.. Its another society caring for autism.. Yeap.. its another.. not the only. I wonder how many of you knew this fact.

There is also another society for autism, i.e. "Society for the Management of Autism Related issues - Training, Education and Resources" aka 'SMARTER'. There was this Charity Evening which featured our local artists organised by them + the IM Of UBD.. Ring any bells?? Still no?. Haha.. doesn't matter. Guess, now you should! Ahh, but wait wait what's autism btw?

Off i went on my lil' research.. google 'autism'

Here's what I found.

an adorable baby (source:www.lifedynamix.com)

What is autism?

According to Wikipedia, "Autism is a brain development disorder that impairs social interaction and communication, and causes restricted and repetitive behavior, all starting before a child is three years old."



Autism Symptoms (source: library.thinkquest.org)


Anyways, it's good to hear that Brunei do pay attention on autism.

So what could you or me do to help em??

Typical responses include: "I'm not rich ler.. Allowance alum kluar! .. I rather spend on Excapade! .. and so on..."

-->'Nada Cash Wah' solution
Nah.. u don't need to be rich to help lar. SMARTER came up with this shop whereby people can donate their old items to. Money from items sold would be to aid SMARTER, thus the autism patients.As easy as that. Don't go throwing away ur old stuff yah! Those stuff could help others..

Important INFO:
SMARTER shop is at Wisma Jaya building (ground floor) right opposite of HSBC in Bandar.

-->'Hehe.. actually ada sikit cash lah' solution
If you've got cash at hand or prefer to aid in the form of cash, I guess there is a way to aid them too. It seems that you could be a member of the "Learning Ladders" society, 'Support member' to be more exact, for the mere fee of $50 according to this page.

I also came across another interesting local blog related to autism too. Its about Raiyan, a autism child and his journey in life. I haven't finished reading all of the posts there, but do have a read.. there is definitely a lot to learn from it.

At this moment, that is all I know about autism and autism in Brunei.

Thus, happy reading ppl.. :)

happiness?

I stumbled upon this interesting article on NYTimes. It's about the human and happiness, the way we depict happiness and many more. This social psychologist here, who had written a best-selling book on happiness, is being interview by a reporter of NYTimes. We could learn a lot from this convo. Do enjoy!

A Conversation With Daniel Gilbert
The Smiling Professor

By CLAUDIA DREIFUS
Published: April 22, 2008

At Harvard, the social psychologist Daniel Gilbert is known as Professor Happiness. That is because the 50-year-old researcher directs a laboratory studying the nature of human happiness. Dr. Gilbert’s “Stumbling on Happiness” was a New York Times paperback best seller for 23 weeks and won the 2007 Royal Society Prize for Science Books.

'Stumbling on Happiness,' by Daniel Gilbert: The Joy of Delusion (May 7, 2006)


Q. HOW DID YOU STUMBLE ONTO YOUR AREA OF STUDY?

A. It was something that happened to me roughly 13 years ago. I spent the first decade of my career studying what psychologists call “the fundamental attribution error,” which is about how people have the tendency to ignore the power of external situations to determine human behavior.

Why do many people, for instance, believe the uneducated are stupid?

I’d have been content to work on this for many more years, but some things happened in my own life.

Within a short period of time, my mentor passed away, my mother died, my marriage fell apart and my teenage son developed problems in school. What I soon found was that as bad as my situation was, it wasn’t devastating. I went on.

One day, I had lunch with a friend who was also going through difficult times. I told him: “If you’d have asked me a year ago how I’d deal with all this, I’d have predicted that I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning.”

He nodded and added, “Are we the only people who could be so wrong in predicting how we’d respond to extreme stress?”

That got me thinking. I wondered: How accurately do people predict their emotional reactions to future events?

Q. HOW DOES THAT RELATE TO UNDERSTANDING HAPPINESS?

A. Because if we can’t predict how we’d react in the future, we can’t set realistic goals for ourselves or figure out how to reach to them.

What we’ve been seeing in my lab, over and over again, is that people have an inability to predict what will make us happy — or unhappy. If you can’t tell which futures are better than others, it’s hard to find happiness. The truth is, bad things don’t affect us as profoundly as we expect them to. That’s true of good things, too. We adapt very quickly to either.

So the good news is that going blind is not going to make you as unhappy as you think it will. The bad news is that winning the lottery will not make you as happy as you expect.

Q. ARE YOU SAYING THAT PEOPLE ARE HAPPY WITH WHATEVER CARDS ARE DEALT TO THEM?

A. As a species, we tend to be moderately happy with whatever we get. If you take a scale that goes from zero to 100, people, generally, report their happiness at about 75. We keep trying to get to 100. Sometimes, we get there. But we don’t stay long.

We certainly fear the things that would get us down to 20 or 10 — the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, a serious challenge to our health. But when those things happen, most of us will return to our emotional baselines more quickly than we’d predict. Humans are wildly resilient.

Q. DO MOST OF US HARBOR UNREASONABLE NOTIONS OF WHAT HAPPINESS IS?

A. Inaccurate, flawed ideas. Few of us can accurately gauge how we will feel tomorrow or next week. That’s why when you go to the supermarket on an empty stomach, you’ll buy too much, and if you shop after a big meal, you’ll buy too little.

Another factor that makes it difficult to forecast our future happiness is that most of us are rationalizers. We expect to feel devastated if our spouse leaves us or if we get passed over for a big promotion at work.

But when things like that do happen, it’s soon, “She never was right for me,” or “I actually need more free time for my family.” People have remarkable talent for finding ways to soften the impact of negative events. Thus they mistakenly expect such blows to be much more devastating than they turn out to be.


Q. SO, IF WE DIDN’T HAVE THESE MECHANISMS, WOULD WE BE TOO DEPRESSED TO GO ON?

A. There may be something to that. People who are clinically depressed often seem to lack the ability to reframe events. That suggests that if the rest of us didn’t have this, we might be depressed as well.

Q. AS THE AUTHOR OF A BEST SELLER ABOUT HAPPINESS, DO YOU HAVE ANY ADVICE ON HOW PEOPLE CAN ACHIEVE IT?

A. I’m not Dr. Phil.

We know that the best predictor of human happiness is human relationships and the amount of time that people spend with family and friends.

We know that it’s significantly more important than money and somewhat more important than health. That’s what the data shows. The interesting thing is that people will sacrifice social relationships to get other things that won’t make them as happy — money. That’s what I mean when I say people should do “wise shopping” for happiness.

Another thing we know from studies is that people tend to take more pleasure in experiences than in things. So if you have “x” amount of dollars to spend on a vacation or a good meal or movies, it will get you more happiness than a durable good or an object. One reason for this is that experiences tend to be shared with other people and objects usually aren’t.

Q. HAVE YOU JUST EXPRESSED A VERY ANTI-AMERICAN IDEA?

A. Oh, you can spend lots of money on experiences. People think a car will last and that’s why it will bring you happiness. But it doesn’t. It gets old and decays. But experiences don’t. You’ll “always have Paris” — and that’s exactly what Bogart meant when he said it to Ingrid Bergman. But will you always have a washing machine? No.

Today, I’m going to Dallas to meet my wife and I’m flying first class, which is ridiculously expensive. But the experience will be far more delightful than a new suit. Another way I follow what I’ve learned from data is that I don’t chase dollars now that I have enough of them, because I know that it will take a very large amount of money to increase my happiness by a small amount.

You couldn’t pay me $100,000 to miss a play date with my granddaughters.

And that’s not because I’m rich. That’s because I know that a hundred grand won’t make me as happy as nurturing my relationship with my granddaughters will.

Q. SO YOU HOLD WITH THE NOTION THAT “MONEY CAN’T BUY YOU HAPPINESS”?

A. I wouldn’t say that. The data says that with the poor, a little money can buy a lot of happiness. If you’re rich, a lot of money can buy you a little more happiness. But in both cases, money does it.

Q. ARE YOU, DAN GILBERT, HAPPY?

A. I am. I think good things are happening to me and will continue. I am not optimistic about the rest of the species, but I’m so blessed, it’s almost scary. I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I have a wildly sunny disposition. I love to laugh. My book is full of jokes.